Productivity

They say I don’t need to be productive.

They say I can put down the spreadsheets and the work calls, that I can push all of it to the back of my mind, that I don’t have to answer that email or think about my next meeting, that I can turn it off and forget and that it’ll all be okay-

but what if I can’t?

what if I don’t know how to do anything else?

what if I’ve never learned how to relax?

and what if focusing on all the work means I don’t have to think about how I don’t know how to

breathe?