Classic Poem

A: ffreind of mine not long agoe
desired att my hands
some pretty toy to moue delight
to those tha t hearers stand.
the w hi ch I meane to gratiffye
by all the meanes I may,
& moue delight in euery wight
tha t w i th affection stay.

Some thought to proue wherin I shold
these seuerall humors please,
the w hi ch to doe, reason fforbidds,
lest I shold some displease;
but sith my muse doth plesure Chuse,
& theron bends her skill,
wherby I may driue time away,
& sorrowes quite beguile

It was my Chance, not long agoe,
by a pleasant wood to walke,
wheere I vnseene of any one
did heare tow louers talke;
& as these louers forth did passe,
hard by a pleasant shade,
hard by a mighty Pine tree there,
their resting place they made

" Insooth, " then did this youngman say,
" I thinke this ffragrant place
was only made for louers true
eche others to inbrace. "
hee tooke her by the middle small, —
good sooth I doe not mocke, —
not meaning to doe any thing
but to pull vpp her: smo: blocke

wheron shee sate, poore silly soule,
to rest her weary bones.
this maid shee was noe whitt affraiyd,
but shee caught him ffast by the: stones: thumbes;
wheratt he vext & greiued was,
soe tha t his fflesh did wrinkle;
this maid shee was noe whitt affrayd,
but caught him fast hold by the: pintle: pimple

w hi ch hee had on his chin likwise; —
but lett the pimple passe; —
there is no man heare but he may supposse
shee weere a merry lasse
he boldly ventured, being tall,
yet in his speech bu[t] blunt,
hee neu er ceast, but tooke vpp all,
& cacht her by the Cun: plumpe

And red rose lipps he kisst full sweete:
q uo th shee, " I craue no sucour. "
w hi ch made him to haue a mighty mind
to clipp, kisse, & to: ffuck: plucke her
into his armes " nay! soft! " q uo th shee,
" what needeth all this doing?
ffor if you wilbe ruled by me,
you shall vse small time in wooinge.

" ffor I will lay me downe, " q uo th shee,
" vpon the slippery seggs,
& all my clothes Ile trusse vp round,
& spread abroad my: leggs: eggs,
w hi ch I haue in my aperne heare
vnder my girdle tuckt;
soe shall I be most ffine & braue,
most ready to be: fuckt: ducket

" vnto some pleasant springing well;
ffor now itts time of the yeere
to decke, & bath, & trim ourselues
both head, hands, ffeet & geere. "