Classic Poem

Les escargots.

Turned out of doors, the bailiff dodging,
I scoured the village for a lodging:
When a coarse snail before me lay,
His horns poked out to block my way
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

He seems, this chap who flouts me now,
To say, " How mean a wretch art thou;
Thou canst not call a roof thine own,
The snail's a freeholder, 'tis known! "
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

At threshold of his house of pearl,
This sleek, though somewhat slimy churl,
Proud he's a housekeeper, the airs
Of cit, bedecked with order, wears
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

The bore of moving — this he knows not;
To him, for rent, collector goes not:
If rows are threatening in the street,
Presto! he's snug in his retreat
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

Ennui can't plague such simple minds;
He makes the best of all he finds;
Grows fat upon another's toils,
And rose and tender vine-leaf soils
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

In vain the most melodious bird
Would tempt him — deuce a bit he's stirred:
The bumpkin! as for voice or wings —
He wonders why there are such things
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

This cit, good faith, is in the right of it;
Strange, men of mind should make so light of it!
For keeping other folks aloof,
There's nought like having one's own roof.
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

Two Chambers — as I have been told —
Their legislators serve to hold:
So many are like him, 'tis clear
He's either Deputy, or Peer
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.

Crawling, according to his plan,
I'll make myself, then, if I can,
A snail Elector; and still higher,
As eligible snail, aspire
With backs set up, pride never fails
These fine, spruce gentlemen, the snails.