Member Poem

Distorted Seduction 
 
I look in the kitchen drawer
for a peeler to skin potatoes.
A glare of a sharp knife taunts me
with a sinister laugh of enticing intentions.
 
I lift the stainless steel away
from the silver company
my fingers begin to tremble
as I grip the knife’s body.
 
Blade in, blade out-blood begins to drip.
I am intrigued how easily flesh separates.
The urge of fight or flight
but there is no escape from your own ragged skin.
 
Blood trumps the logic
so I press in deep 
in search of what I need
to cut persistent agitations.
 
It’s the sting that soothes
the bitter waters that flow in my mind.
Elation courses thru my body
as the river of blood subsides
divides flesh from pain and numb realities.
 
It’s nice to explore
what lies under the flesh,
to entertain the pleasant
distraction of harrowing musings.
 
I stare at the crimson road atlas on my wrist
delicate thin lines of blade art
guide my thoughts, the travels of release.
This artistic reminder navigates the distance
between agony and relief.
 
I hold my wrist over the sink
feel the blood’s wetness
trickle down my arm.
Pain slices thru my dull emotions
slowly cuts the drumbeat of despondency
 
I watch the sink splatter with scarlet stains
as I wash the vital fluid away.
I wipe the blade clean
after this raw peeling of emotions.
 
I wonder when I prepare my next meal,
will I look away from the seductive knife
and try to convince myself
that I am the one in control?

First published in OTVmagazine.com in Nov. 2015