Member Poem

The lid
of my mind
opened up.

The lid became unscrewed and what was inside was gooped out and and taken away.
 Chewed over. 

New light and a bigger eye came down through.

I feel a new weight. 
It feels as if there is another me now and this me actually really likes the me I am and the me I am not and I like it.  A bit of a formless shapeshifting really. 

Imagine!

To be subsumed in perceptions of doom and then to have a new expansion occur somewhere inside that reveals what was never dared to dream of or hope about for before.  
It is truly glorious!  To feel such joy going about my days and nights.

To feel a sustainability for the creativity of excitment and the consistency of practicing aacepting dissappointment.  

To feel such excitment coursing unbludgeoned and actually loved and encouraged coursing throughout my world view.  
I know what fearful feels like.
This must feel what beautiful is like.

I let myself.  Actively with people at work and with people within my  home.  I let myself feel this joy untrampled and I spread it to those around me.  I practice letting myself believe in what joyful feels like from with inside my own breathing form of a body.

What joyful nerve.
  The gall of it all delights me in an appalling and oppresive system.

The fearlessness of it all!  

Oh how the joyful earned freedom of it all is!

Having been down in the dark of my self
I found jewels sparkling.
 I dug trenches to flood the jewels out of the mountain and back into my awareness.
 I cried rivers and thus sent the jewels on their pathways out.
 Coursing! Coursing! Through me!  

Jewel Water.

Water that has been mineralized by precious jewels.  
I bathe in it.  I drink this sparkle hydration. 
I am sparkling from withinside myself and it feels, I feel like a luminous lantern and a little bit like a light shine.

Oh!  For my little self for my friends for my little pets and neices and nephews and family and old teachers and others that I love from as up close as I can and as far I let this little light shine.
For to be me in a happy way is now a possibilty for me.
I can feel it.  And so, I do it.  Because I now can. 
I am.