Classic Poem

1

In Carmel Bay the people say,
We feed the Lazzaroni
On caramels, and cockle-shells
And hunks of abalone.

2

O, some folks boast of quail on toast,
Because they think it's tony;
But my tom-cat gets nice and fat
On hunks of abalone.

3

He hides in caves, beneath the waves,
His ancient patrimony:
Race suicide will ne'er betide
The fertile abalone.

4

I telegraph my better half
By Morse or by Marconi
But when in need of greater speed
I send an abalone.

5

Some folks say that pain is real
And some say that it's phoney;
But as for me, when I can't agree,
I eat an abalone.

6

Our naval hero, best of all,
His name was Pauley Joney;
He sailed the seas as he darn pleased,
But he never ate abalone.