Classic Poem

He thought he saw the Unicorn, the horned and holy horse,
He looked again and saw it was a Subject for Remorse,
He rushed for what he meant to post—
and didn't post, of course.

He thought he saw the Unicorn, the Virgin's wildest pet,
He looked again and saw it was a Long Outstanding Debt.
He wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote—
and hasn't written yet.

He thought he saw the Unicorn, her mane a wind of pride,
He looked again and tried again, and worked until he died;
He ordered a Pantechnicon—
that's waiting still outside.

He thought he saw the Unicorn, that breaketh curb and bond,
He looked and saw a girl of whom he was extremely fond . . .
The floods rose to the Chilterns when
they found him in his pond.

He thought he saw the Unicorn, crowned of the Silver Spear,
He wondered if it was a Stag and saw it was a Dear—
And so he drowned himself—
some say in Water—
some in Beer.