Classic Poem

I.

I sing of a war set on foot for a toy,
And of Paris, and Helen, and Hector, and Troy,
Where on women, kings, gen'rals, and coblers you stumble,
And of mortals and gods meet a very strange jumble.

Sing didderoo bubberoo, oh my joy,
How sweetly they did one another destroy!
Come, fill up your bumpers, the whisky enjoy,
May we ne'er see the like of the siege of Troy!

II.

Menelaus was happy wid Helen his wife,
Except that she led him a devil of a life,
Wid dat handsome tafe Paris she'd toy and she'd play,
Till they pack'd up their alls, and they both ran away
Sing didderoo, &c.

III.

Agamemnon, and all the great chiefs of his house,
Soon took up the cause of this hornified spouse,
While Juno said this thing, and Venus said that,
And the gods fell a wrangling they knew not for what,
Sing didderoo, &c.

IV.

Oh den such a slaughter, and cutting of trotes,
And slaying of bullocks, and offering up grats?
Till the cunning Ulysses, the Trojans to cross,
Clapt forty fine fellows in one wooden home.
Sing didderoo, &c.

V.

Oh den for to see the maids, widows, and wives,
Crying some for their virtue, and some for their lives;
Thus after ten years they'd defended their town,
Poor dear Troy in ten minutes was all burns down!
Sing didderoo, &c.

VI.

But to see how it ended's the best joke of all,
Scarce had wrong'd Menelaus ascended the wall,
But he blubb'ring saw Helen, and, oh strange to tell,
The man took his mare, and so all was well.
Sing didderoo, &c.