Classic Poem

Oh , don't disturb the gentleman,
He's as busy as can be!
You might attract his notice from
Something that he should see.
Just touch your hat, and quickly say,
Good-morning or, Ta-ta,
For he's got to run the universe—
Colon and Panama!

Pray, think of what he's got to do,
This very busy man!
He's got the biggest kind of job,
Just match it if you can.
He's got to note the time when we
Arise to start the day,
And he's got to listen carefully
To every word we say.

He's got to watch us labor, and
He's got to watch us play;
He's got to know what debts we owe,
And why we cannot pay;
He's got to know what cost the clothes
In which we look so neat—
The necktie and the hat we wear,
And the shoes upon our feet.

He's got to see us at our meals,
Know what we eat and drink;
He's got to know what books we read,
As well as what we think.
If we sit down awhile to chat
With friends of many years,
He's got to join the party with
His all-absorbing ears.

If we to town go for a walk
When sunset ends our work,
He's got to sneak round corners bleak,
Or in dark alleys lurk,
To see what we are doing here,
Or what we're doing there,
And run the risk of fever in
The evening's heavy air.

He's got to know the “female” that
“Does up” our weekly shirt;
(She may wear diamonds in her ears,
Or lace upon her skirt!)
Or, if one has that wondrous thing
(That doubtful joy of life),
He's got to know each time that one
Has a squabble with his wife.

He's got to listen to the tale
Of every injured soul;
Of every row between two friends,
He's got to know the whole.
Of what most folks talk sparingly,
He's got to glibly shout,
And run like lightning up and down
To spread it all about.

He's got to watch the Government,
Each corporation, too;
And every private enterprise
He's got to carry through.
He's got to keep a-moving, and
Must never blink his eye,
For he's got to have his finger in
Each individual pie!

So don't disturb the gentleman—
I'm sure, you plainly see
That, as Mister Gossip is his name,
He's as busy as can be.
Just nod your head, and quickly say,
Good-morning or, Ta-ta,
For he's got to run the universe—
Colon and Panama!