Classic Poem

O'er the men of Ethiopia she would pour her cornucopia,
And shower wealth and plenty on the people of Japan,
Send down jelly cake and candies to the Indians of the Andes,
And a cargo of plum pudding to the men of Hindustan;
And she said she loved 'em so—
Bushman, Finn and Eskimo.—
If she had the wings of eagles to their succor she would fly,
Loaded down with jam and jelly,
Succotash and vermicelli,
Prunes, pomegranates, plums and pudding, peaches, pineapples and pie.

She would fly with speedy succor to the natives of Molucca
With whole loads of quail and salmon, and with tons of fricassee,
And give cake in fullest measure
To the men of Australasia
And all the archipelagoes that dot the Southern sea;
And the Anthropophagi,
All their lives deprived of pie,
She would satiate and satisfy with custard, cream and mince;
And those miserable Australians
And the Borrioboolaghalians,
She would gorge with choicest jelly, raspberry, currant, grape and quince.

But, like old war-time hardtackers, her poor husband lived on crackers
Bought at wholesale from a baker, eaten from the mantel shelf;
If the men of Madagascar
And the natives of Alaska,
Had enough to sate their hunger, let him look out for himself.
And his coat had but one tail
And he used a shingle nail
To fasten up his “gallus” when he went out to his work;
And she used to spend his money
To buy sugar plums and honey
For the Terra del Fuegian and the Turcoman and Turk.