prevails to be united part and parcel
of (ups and downs)
constituting human rat race
swallowed up within the vast cosmos
as an infinitesimal speck
amidst the chaotic
activity of one uppity simian
broadcasting fabulous
notoriety the universe over,
where one measly mortal
congratulating himself as all time muckraker
since beginning of the space/time continuum
barely contemplating veritable insignificance,
nevertheless trumpets his daily rag exclusively
dedicated to him front to back as megalomaniacal
self published magazine courtesy private press
touting supremacy of himself
and trumpeting consequential
self importance of none other than himself,
no matter astronomers estimate
there are roughly 200 sextillion
to 1 septillion (ten to the twenty third
or ten to the twenty fourth power)
stars in the observable cosmos
twinkling to appease unnamed
person's totalitarian thirst
for unadulterated control
awaiting to be forcibly acquired
supplementing the morass of deafening din
echoing across the potential vast globular orbs

(triggering mass hysteria to elect themself

for next apprenticed capricious earthling

to become commander in chief
that spins around axis

and rotates around sun)

on one oblate spheroid,
where estimates suggest
there are roughly 100 sextillion
to 300 sextillion planets
(ten to the twenty third
to three times ten
to the twenty third power)
webbed wide worlds
eagerly awaiting arrival
of one particular individual
within the madding crowd
counting crows among the yardbirds
(id est impossible mission
to get conviction
of life sentence overturned
as born a hard core criminal),
thus condemned to Hades whim,
while one among countless

species of raptors circles overhead,

nevertheless about
twenty four hours ago,
a most harried styled
swiftly tailored day
returning two Verizon phones
and two Amazon Alexa echoes
to their respective headquarters
courtesy United Parcel Service
strongly encouraged me
courtesy the wife for yours truly
to chill and diminish frenzied state
to bring frantic and frazzled hubby
coaxed into calm state
courtesy an attempt to meditate
or simply relax listening
to burbling water
playing on YouTube to help alleviate
crushing oppressive frazzled,
and Farblunget (also spelled farblondjet
or farblonjet, pronounced farb-LAWN-jet
a Yiddish adjective meaning "lost,"
"hopelessly confused,"
or "messed up,"
but more than a feeling for meditation ensued,
(when initially pillow
propped up my head),
I conked out within blink of an eye,

and dreamt where self envisioned skeptic

housed within Ziggurat
atop the highest floor
experienced urgent need to defecate
after drinking cranberry juice
laced with three capfuls of miralax
and felt the uncontrollable urge to evacuate,
cue the fable about
three pigs who build houses
of straw, sticks, and bricks a big bad wolf
blows down the straw and stick houses,
eating the first two pigs,
however, he cannot
destroy the brick house,
and the third pig outsmarts the wolf,
resulting in the wolf's defeat
thus similar how I felt after
grunting, heaving and pushing
or as if giving birth in vain
false alarm in the doggone paw city
of Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
please I prayed to the god(dess)
of the excretory system
all for naught
despite letting countless biscuits fly
as sphincter muscles did overtime
(no faux pas) of an angry dog,
sorry to be cheeky, but I diligently tried
to unleash bowels,
which felt absolute zero movement
out my body electric,
nevertheless perspiration
soaked thru clothing
while trying anything
to distract my lamentable situation
even straining my utmost
to being within
earshot of a schizophrenic
inspired vocalization
within Tower of Babel,
where a riot of other sounds
from many lapping tongues
across the sea of Galilee
also known as Kinneret,
Lake Tiberias, or Lake Gennesaret
encompassed more than
sounded like a millennium
of dead souls plaintively wailing
worthwhile to participate in soundgarden
after murmuring recantation
against the manifold
utterances of profanity
cursing the tens of thousands
of human tribes
preceding my existence,
fraught with chronic constipation,
which initial proto simians
who experienced rectal obstruction
soon after learning to stand erect
on hill er.. re: of duff feat
when the raging battles
within lower gastrointestinal tract
necessitated applying rudimentary
hook, line and sinker hooked
within buttocks where cohorts
joined forces and willingly
sacrificed crème de la crème
incorporating applying battering ram
since the genesis and dawn
of cut throat civilization
laughable poetic pastiche
excluded from pantheon

of poets with a shiny hiney

a euphemism, meaning 
a substitute for a word

(like the name of a body part)

that may be considered

impolite to say.