Classic Poem

1

Miss Slimmens she's as trim a lass
As any you can find —
She always wears an old brown dress,
All busted out behind.

2

She talketh scandal all day long,
With false malicious tongue —
She'd blast the brightest character
That ever poet sung.

3

She said our ladies, one & all
Were partisans of Jeff
And when they brought her to the scratch
She proved it — o'er the left.

4

On Truman she was monstrous hard,
And hard she was on Brown,
Said they'd a way of nipping cash
Peculiarly their own.

5

She gave Mark Twain an awful shot,
And Kingdom did she lift.
From White & Thayer the fur did fly
Lord! how she snuffed out Smith!

6

She crowded Lewis till he swore
If she would stop the war,
He'd take the cussed newspaper
She corresponded for.

7

She said 'twas funny Baker's charms
No woman could withstand,
But if she saw where those charms lay
She wished she might be destroyed.

8

Now dear Miss Slimmens take a hint,
From this rude song we've sung
And do belay your gossiping,
Trice up your blasted tongue!