Classic Poem

I know another gentleman, whose name I have forgotten;
His line of merchandise was wool—or maybe it was cotton.
I overheard his partner and himself at conversation
Regarding the emoluments of cloth adulteration.

“Now, larger dividends accrue from mixing wool with shoddy;
We have to stick 'em somehow. Ain't it done by everybody?
Besides,” he argued clearly as a Mannie Kant magician,
“In business, you must do a lot to meet the competition.”

That night I heard him make a speech—a sturdy and sincere one,
If it has ever been my pleasant privilege to hear one,
Replete with ringing words it was, and this is how it ended:
“The honor of the Stars and Stripes [Applause] must be defended.”