Classic Poem

A LOVELY HOUSEMAID

O F all the names I ever knew,
The most affectionate is Coo .
But, Queen of Doves! I own to you ,
That sweet Rebecca should be Coo .
If lips were ever made of glue,
Such, to my thoughts, are those of Coo;
Thoughts which distract me in the pew ,
If I'm at Church, and peep at Coo .
You 've heard, perhaps, of Hybla's dew,
'Tis nothing to the taste of Coo .
My cups of nectar fain I 'd brew
(Love's Whitbread) in the lips of Coo .
I envy him that makes a shoe
For such a foot as that of Coo;
Besides, the ancle he can view,
When measuring the foot of Coo .
Of all the Love-inviting crew
That Sidcop knows, give me to Coo .
The Cook is old — Rebecca 's new,
And Bailey 's more in clouds than Coo .
From Bailey 's head my parcel flew;
It would not have been so with Coo .
The rain that fell, the wind that blew,
Would not have dis-concerted Coo .
With Giants what have I to do,
I 'm for a curricle with Coo .
Her cheeks have the vermilion hue,
The rouge that Nature gives to Coo .
If I don't love her, I 'm a Jew ,
A Shylock , and the victim Coo:
But, if to me her flesh was due,
The knife and scales I 'd give to Coo .
Of Maids I 've romp'd with not a few;
With none so prettily as Coo .
No child unborn the day shall rue,
That first acquainted me with Coo .
In verse alone my passion grew,
And rhymes are all I get from Coo .
" Plump as a Partridge in a mew,
Beware of Hawks! " quoth Jane to Coo .
The Cook is rather in a stew,
To see me lick my lips at Coo .
To Virgins old I offer Yew,
But Myrtle-wreaths to Love and Coo .
A suppliant on my knees I 'd sue,
To peep at garters worn by Coo .
If she would lose, I 'd play at loo,
With none so often as with Coo .
Though Jane cries pish , and Bet says pooh!
" Yes, and with all my heart! " says Coo .
Her little rents I 'd never screw ,
A kiss the pepper-corn of Coo .
Canadian woods all day I 'd hew,
If the Miranda there was Coo .
There 's no Ap Griffith , nor Sir Hugh ,
Whose pedigree would start at Coo .
The words are sweet, the heart is true,
In all the letters writ by Coo .
There 's none can write a billet-doux
With half the tenderness of Coo .
I 'd waive the artificial flue,
If I could warm the house with Coo .
To Rumford stoves I 'd bid adieu ,
If I could stir the fire of Coo .
There 's no describing what old Q .
Would give to mumble Becky Coo:
But soon the Duke would get his cue,
If he took liberties with Coo .
The girl of girls, don't ask me " who? "
You know it, Fame , is Becky Coo .