Classic Poem

A NURSERY SONG

I am a babe of Royalty;
Queen Charlotte was my grannam;
And Parliament has voted me
Six thousand pounds per annum,
To teach me how to read and write,
To teach me elocution,
To teach me how to feast and fight
For the King and Constitution,
As a well-taught Prince should do,
Who is taught by contribution.

I'll have a doll of porphyry,
With diamonds in her curls,
And a rocking-horse of ivory,
And a skipping-rope of pearls;
I'll have a painted paper kite,
With banker's bills for wings,
And a golden fiddle to play at night,
With silver wire for strings,
As a well-taught Prince should have,
Who is sprung from the German Kings.

My Woman of the Bedchamber
Shall dress in the finest silk;
And a Nobleman of Hanover
Shall boil my bread and milk;
My breeches shall be of cloth of gold,
My nightcap of Mechlin lace;
And Cologne water, hot and cold,
Shall be ready to wash my face,
As a well-taught Prince should wash,
Who is come of a royal race.

And when my coach and six shall jog,
With horns, hussars, and banners,
To some gaunt German pedagogue,
Who teaches Greek and manners,
How very ready I shall be
To show that I'm fit for ruling,
By gaming and by gallantry,
And other kinds of fooling,
Which a well-taught Prince should learn,
Who costs so much in schooling.

I'll learn of Uncle G EORGE to make
A sword knot, and a bow,
And I'll learn of Uncle York to take
The long odds, and a vow;
And Uncle C LARENCE shall supply
The science of imprecation,
And you, my own papa shall try,
To teach me fabrication,
Which a well-taught Prince should study,
Whose tutors are paid by the nation.

I'll learn from P EEL his lunacy
About the Priests and Popes,
From ***, to live in infamy,
From C ANNING , to talk in tropes;
From B LOMFIELD to discern new lights,
To darken the old from S COTT ,
From L IVERPOOL , the chartered rights
Which an Englishman — has not,
As a well-taught Prince should know,
Who is born for a Kingly lot.

While Education, day by day,
My native wit enlarges,
Oh, shall I not at last repay
The Country's heavy charges?
As wise as any other G UELPH ,
As useful, and as dear,
Oh, shall I not procure myself
A People's scorn and fear?
Which a well-taught Prince should earn,
With six thousand pounds a year.