Classic Poem

C ÆSAR and Blackstone, mighty men,
One drew the sword, and one the pen.
One clear'd law's antiquated den,
One took to war's vagaries.
Both well contriv'd themselves to entrench;
One Junius fought, and one the French;
That sought the Throne, this found the Bench,
And both wrote Commentaries.

These militant and civil elves,
One Easter Monday, found themselves,
Well bound, on Doctor Lettsom's shelves;
They form'd his favourite study.
There would he read of statutes, cars,
Of special pleading, Picts, and scars,
Justinian Pandects, and the wars
Of Julius fierce and bloody.

" Read these, " he cried with buoyant speech
To Doctor Cooke, a fellow-leech,
" There mount, and either volume reach:
How each in style concise is! "
Cooke, by his Quaker friend thus press'd,
Made the selection he thought best,
And read what Blackstone writes on Test-
-Amentary devises.

" Doctors, experienced or raw,
Should learn " (read Cooke) " enough of law
To enable them a will to draw
Whene'er a crisis summons;
When call'd to deal with pains and aches,
'Tis needful for their patients' sakes:
Oft, by their aid, that writing makes
Its way to Doctors' Commons. "

" Is that in Blackstone? " — " Ay, " quoth Cooke.
" Enough, " said Lettsom: " close the book;
The public will derisive look,
If this gets wind, will soon eye us. "
" True, " cried the other, with a wink;
" If such this heresy, I think
The Commentating Man of Ink
Deserved to die by Junius . "

" There bind him in his clasp of lead,
Re-lodge the slanderer overhead,
And reach down Caesar in his stead, "
(Quoth he who wore the beaver:
" His classic pan, undipp'd in gall,
Will ne'er on the profession fall;
Read, and thou'lt prove, like me, of all
He writes a stanch believer. "

" They who " (read Cooke) " the fight pursue
On foot, but trivial mischief do;
Within their line of march but few
Are found t' engage their forces;
But when on spoils of war they thrive,
And, arm'd in point, in charlots strive,
Death darkly follows where they drive,
And carnage marks their courses. "

" Hold there! " with something like an oath
The Quaker cried — " however loth
T' abjure my books, henceforth on both
I launch my prohibitions;
Caesar, in mischief match'd by none,
Writes not of Britons dead and gone;
'Tis a decided libel on
The College of Physicians.

" Caesar, avaunt! " — Quoth Cooke, " Amen!
The Roman strives with subtle pen
Our trade to countermine, and then
From practice to uproot us:
If, foe to physic, thus he feel
Regardless of the public weal,
The Commentating Man of steel
Deserved to die by Brutus . "