Classic Poem

1

Did none of you hear,
Of a wonder last year,
That through all Norfolk did ring?
Of an Inn and an Host,
With a Sign and a post
That might hold (God bless us) the King?

2

The building is great
And very compleat,
But can't be compard to the signe;
But within doors, I think
's scarce a drop of good drink,
For Bacchus drinks all the best wine.

3

But here's the design,
What's amisse in the Wine,
By wenches shall be supply'd;
There's three on a row
Stands out for a show,
To draw in the Gallants that ride.

4

The first of the three,
Diana should be,
But she cuckolded poor Actaeon ,
And his head she adorns,
With such visible horns,
That he's fit for his hounds for to prey on.

5

'Tis unsafe we do find
To trust Women kind,
Since horning's a part of their trade;
Diana is plac't
As a Goddesse that's chast,
Yet Actaeon a Monster she made.

6

The next wench doth stand,
With the scales in her hand
And is ready to come at your beck;
A new trick they've found,
To sell sack by the pound,
But 'twere better they'd sell't by the peck.

7

The last of the three
They say prudence must be
With the serpent and horn of plenty;
But plenty and wit
So seldom doth hit,
That they fall not to one in twenty.

8

But above these things all,
Stands a fellow that's small,
With a Quadrant discerning the wind,
And says hee's a fool
That travells from Skoale ,
And leaves his good liquor behind.

9

Nere the top of the sign,
Stand three on a line,
One is Temperance, still powring out;
And Fortitude will
Drink what Temperance fill,
And fears not the stone or the gout.

10

The next to these three
You'l an Usurer see,
With a prodigal child in his mouth;
'Tis Time (as some say)
And well so it may
For they be devourers both.

11

The last that you stare on
Is old father Charon
Who's wafting a wench o're the ferry,
Where Cerberus do's stand
To watch where they land,
And together they go to be merry.

12

Now to see such a change
Is a thing that is strange
That one who as stories do tell us,
His money has lent
At fifty per cent
A Colledg should build for goodfellows.

13

But under this work
Do's a mistery lurk,
That shewes us the founders design,
He has chalk'd out the way
For Gallants to stray,
That their lands may be his in fine.

14

That's first an Ale-bench,
Next hounds then a wench,
With these three to roar and to revel;
Brings the prodigals lands,
To the Usurers hands
And his body and soul to the Devil.

15

Now if you would know
After all this adoe,
By what name this sign should be known,
Some call't this, and some that,
And some I know not what;
But 'tis many signs in one.

16

'Tis a sign that who built it
Had more money then wit,
And more wealth then he got or can use,
'Tis a sign that all we
Have lesse wit then he
That go thither to drink and may chuse.