To the Tune of The Four-legg'd Elder .
1.
All that have two or but one ear,
(I dare not tell ye half)
You of an Essex Colt shall hear
Will shame their very Calf .
In Horsley Fields near Colchester
A Quaker would turn Trooper;
He caught a Foal and mounted her
(O base!) below the Crupper.
Help Lords, and Commons, once more help,
O send us Knives and Daggers!
For if the Quakers be not gelt
Your Troops will have the Staggers.
2.
Ralph Green (it was this Varlet's name)
Of Colchester you'll swear,
For thence the Four-legg'd Elder came,
Was ever such a Pair!
But though 'twas foul 'tween Swash and Jane ,
Yet this is ten times worse;
For then a Dog did play the Man,
But Man now play'd the Horse.
Help, &c.
3.
The Owner of the Colt was nigh,
(Observing their Embrace)
And drawing nearer did espy
The Quaker's sorrel Face:
My Foal is ravish'd (then he cryes,
And fiercely at him ran)
Thou Rogue, I'll have thee haltered twice,
As Horse and eke as Man!
Help, &c.
4.
Ah Devil, do'st thou tremble? now
'Tis sore against thy will;
For Mares and preaching Ladies know
Thou hast a Colts tooth still:
But mine's not guilty of this Fact,
She was by thee compelled;
Poor thing, whom no man ever backt
Thou wickedly hast Bellied.
Help, &c.
5.
O friend (said Green , with sighs and groans)
Let this thy wrath appease!
(And gave him then eight new Half-crowns
To make him hold his peace.)
The man reply'd, though I for this
Conceal thy Hugger Mugger,
Do'st think it lawfull for a Piece
A filly Foal to Bugger?
Help, &c.
6.
The Master saw his Colt defil'd,
Which vext his Soul with doubt;
For if his Filly prov'd with Childe
He knew all would come out:
Then he afresh began to rave,
(For all his Money taking)
Neighbours, said he, I took this Knave
Ith' very act of Quaking .
Help, &c.
7.
Then to the Pinfold (Gaol I mean)
They dragg'd him by the Mane,
They call'd him Beast, and call'd her Quean,
As if she had been Jane .
O stone him (all the Women cry'd)
Nay geld him (which is worse)
Who scorn'd us all, and took a Bride
That's Daughter to a Horse!
Help, &c.
8.
The Colt was silent all this while,
And therefore 'twas no Rape,
The Virgin foal he did beguile,
And so intends to scape:
For though he caught her in a Ditch
Where she could not revolt,
Yet he had no Scott'sh spurr nor Switch
To ride the willing Colt.
Help, &c.
9.
O Essex, Essex, England's pride,
Go burn this long-tail'd Quean,
For though the Thames runs by thy side,
It cannot wash thee clean!
'Tis not thy Bleating Sonn's complaints,
Hold forth such wanton courses,
Thy Oysters hint the very Saint
To horn the very Horses.
Help, &c.
10.
Though they salute not in the Street
(Because they are our Masters)
'Tis now reveal'd why Quakers meet
In Meadows, Woods, and Pastures.
But Hors-men, Mare-men, all and some
Who Man and Beast perplex,
Not only from East-Horsley come,
But from West-Middle-Sex .
Help, &c.
11.
This was not GREEN the Feltmaker ,
Nor Willow GREEN the Baker ,
Nor GEORGE the Sea-GREEN Mariner ,
But RALPH the Grasse-GREEN Quaker ,
Had GREEN the Sow-gelder but known,
And done his Office duly,
Though RALPH was GREEN when he came on,
He had come off most blewly.
Help, &c.
12.
Alas you know by Man's flesh came
The Foul-disease to Naples ,
And now we fear the very same
Is broke into our Stables;
For Death hath stoln so many Steeds
From Prince and Peer, and Carrier,
That this new Murrain rather needs
A FARRAR than a Farrier.
Help, &c.
13.
Nay if this GREEN within the walls
Of Colchester left forces,
Those Cavaliers were Caniballs,
Eating his Humane Horses!
But some make Man their second course ,
(In cool Blood will not spare)
Who butcher Men and favour Horse
Will couple with a Mare.
Help, &c.
14.
This Centaur , unquoth Other thing,
Will make a dreadfull Breach:
Yet though an Ass may speak or sing ,
O let not Horses preach!
But bridle such wilde Colts who can
When they'll obey no Summons,
For things begot 'tween Mare & Man
Are neither Lords nor Commons.
Help, &c.
15.
O Elders, Independants too,
Though all your Power's combin'd
Quakers will grow too strong for you
Now Horse and Man are joyn'd:
While Cavaliers , poor foolish Rogues,
Know only Maids Affairs,
She-Presbyters can deal with Dogs,
And Quaking-men with Mares.
Help, &c.
16.
Now as when Milan Town was rear'd,
A Monstrous Sow untam'd,
With Back half Hair half Wool appear'd,
'Twas Mediolanum nam'd:
So Colchester must have recourse
To some such four-legg'd Sister,
For sure as Horsley came from Horse,
From Colt 'twas call'd Col-chester .
Help, Lords and Commons, &c.
1.
All that have two or but one ear,
(I dare not tell ye half)
You of an Essex Colt shall hear
Will shame their very Calf .
In Horsley Fields near Colchester
A Quaker would turn Trooper;
He caught a Foal and mounted her
(O base!) below the Crupper.
Help Lords, and Commons, once more help,
O send us Knives and Daggers!
For if the Quakers be not gelt
Your Troops will have the Staggers.
2.
Ralph Green (it was this Varlet's name)
Of Colchester you'll swear,
For thence the Four-legg'd Elder came,
Was ever such a Pair!
But though 'twas foul 'tween Swash and Jane ,
Yet this is ten times worse;
For then a Dog did play the Man,
But Man now play'd the Horse.
Help, &c.
3.
The Owner of the Colt was nigh,
(Observing their Embrace)
And drawing nearer did espy
The Quaker's sorrel Face:
My Foal is ravish'd (then he cryes,
And fiercely at him ran)
Thou Rogue, I'll have thee haltered twice,
As Horse and eke as Man!
Help, &c.
4.
Ah Devil, do'st thou tremble? now
'Tis sore against thy will;
For Mares and preaching Ladies know
Thou hast a Colts tooth still:
But mine's not guilty of this Fact,
She was by thee compelled;
Poor thing, whom no man ever backt
Thou wickedly hast Bellied.
Help, &c.
5.
O friend (said Green , with sighs and groans)
Let this thy wrath appease!
(And gave him then eight new Half-crowns
To make him hold his peace.)
The man reply'd, though I for this
Conceal thy Hugger Mugger,
Do'st think it lawfull for a Piece
A filly Foal to Bugger?
Help, &c.
6.
The Master saw his Colt defil'd,
Which vext his Soul with doubt;
For if his Filly prov'd with Childe
He knew all would come out:
Then he afresh began to rave,
(For all his Money taking)
Neighbours, said he, I took this Knave
Ith' very act of Quaking .
Help, &c.
7.
Then to the Pinfold (Gaol I mean)
They dragg'd him by the Mane,
They call'd him Beast, and call'd her Quean,
As if she had been Jane .
O stone him (all the Women cry'd)
Nay geld him (which is worse)
Who scorn'd us all, and took a Bride
That's Daughter to a Horse!
Help, &c.
8.
The Colt was silent all this while,
And therefore 'twas no Rape,
The Virgin foal he did beguile,
And so intends to scape:
For though he caught her in a Ditch
Where she could not revolt,
Yet he had no Scott'sh spurr nor Switch
To ride the willing Colt.
Help, &c.
9.
O Essex, Essex, England's pride,
Go burn this long-tail'd Quean,
For though the Thames runs by thy side,
It cannot wash thee clean!
'Tis not thy Bleating Sonn's complaints,
Hold forth such wanton courses,
Thy Oysters hint the very Saint
To horn the very Horses.
Help, &c.
10.
Though they salute not in the Street
(Because they are our Masters)
'Tis now reveal'd why Quakers meet
In Meadows, Woods, and Pastures.
But Hors-men, Mare-men, all and some
Who Man and Beast perplex,
Not only from East-Horsley come,
But from West-Middle-Sex .
Help, &c.
11.
This was not GREEN the Feltmaker ,
Nor Willow GREEN the Baker ,
Nor GEORGE the Sea-GREEN Mariner ,
But RALPH the Grasse-GREEN Quaker ,
Had GREEN the Sow-gelder but known,
And done his Office duly,
Though RALPH was GREEN when he came on,
He had come off most blewly.
Help, &c.
12.
Alas you know by Man's flesh came
The Foul-disease to Naples ,
And now we fear the very same
Is broke into our Stables;
For Death hath stoln so many Steeds
From Prince and Peer, and Carrier,
That this new Murrain rather needs
A FARRAR than a Farrier.
Help, &c.
13.
Nay if this GREEN within the walls
Of Colchester left forces,
Those Cavaliers were Caniballs,
Eating his Humane Horses!
But some make Man their second course ,
(In cool Blood will not spare)
Who butcher Men and favour Horse
Will couple with a Mare.
Help, &c.
14.
This Centaur , unquoth Other thing,
Will make a dreadfull Breach:
Yet though an Ass may speak or sing ,
O let not Horses preach!
But bridle such wilde Colts who can
When they'll obey no Summons,
For things begot 'tween Mare & Man
Are neither Lords nor Commons.
Help, &c.
15.
O Elders, Independants too,
Though all your Power's combin'd
Quakers will grow too strong for you
Now Horse and Man are joyn'd:
While Cavaliers , poor foolish Rogues,
Know only Maids Affairs,
She-Presbyters can deal with Dogs,
And Quaking-men with Mares.
Help, &c.
16.
Now as when Milan Town was rear'd,
A Monstrous Sow untam'd,
With Back half Hair half Wool appear'd,
'Twas Mediolanum nam'd:
So Colchester must have recourse
To some such four-legg'd Sister,
For sure as Horsley came from Horse,
From Colt 'twas call'd Col-chester .
Help, Lords and Commons, &c.