Too Many Squirts

I asked him his opinion :

Is it government or what?
Whose fault is 't ? What 's the reason

The country 's got dry rot ?
Something 's blue moulding the nation

Whatever it is, it hurts.
And he answered : ' Thish yer country

Raises too many squirts.

u Thur 's too many cock-robin doctors,

While there 's scarse a good hired man ;
An pee- wee lawyers are thicker

Than dust on a grist mill ben.
Bob-o'-link preachers air numerous :

Thish yer I boldly asserts :
This kentry ' his visage was humorous

' She cultivates too many squirts.

44 Thur 's too many agents an drummers ;

I reckon thur 's peddlars galore ;
Thur's too many tiddly-wink farmers

A-keepin hotel er a store.
'Taint thistles, ner yet 'taint ragweed,

Ner docken, ner witch grass, wot hurts
Our crop as a nation 's teetotally

Smothered with too many squirts ! '

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