Tell Me What I'm Feeling

Why can’t I tell what I’m feeling?
Dipped once, twice, in a lake of love
I breathe but I swear I’m not breathing
Vowing never again as the surface breaks above
But the shaking only drives my heart aching
Gasp again and dive deeper yet still
Eyes awake but my heart isn’t awaken
Inhale the water like time before death
Because I crave nearness of a yearning
But do I? Faced with the little sanity left
Lungs are burning oh it’s hurting
Torn between life of air and seemingly death
Why can’t I tell what I’m feeling?