Of the Wilderness of the Secret, or Private Virgin-Cross-Love

FIRST PART

1.

A True Friend came to see Johann in his Recesses;
In quiet Solitude, in lonesom wildernesses;
For He was deadly Sick, & lonesom Day by day;
For joy to see his frind he fainted quite away.

2.

The frind embraced him, with trying to relieve him,
Tho 'twas a pretty while before John could perceive him,
Johannes, says the frind, I know what troubles thee,
What makes thee sick, 'tis Love, which now thou canst not see.

3.

And since thou canst not now, as formerly enjoy her,
So will thou now in Grief, & floods of Tears Dispaier:
Thou thinkst the first Love last, & from the former path,
And that the Lord doth now chastise thee in his wrath.

4.

I Love, replyed John, & can't therefrom defend me.
This Life-consuming-fire; yet strive, with Doubt to mend me:
Since my unworthyness, & my unfaithful wise,
The Mountain of my Sins still comes before my Eyes.

5.

And Oh! how can I be so bold this Grace to do me?
That I do Love deserve, or yet encline unto me
The High & Holy Mind such Favours me to do;
Poluted as I am, should yet be gracious too?

6.

I, who the first love have most shamfully forsaken,
And in the trying times, the Right way had Mistaken,
The Best of all my Works, with self-love chiefly mixt
My then despised foe, has therefore now me fixt.

7.

Now lye I here ensnar'd, & in my Grief entangled;
My Soul doth wish with Job's, to be but only strangled:
I Sinned have, & what shall I do unto thee,
Preserver of Mankind, is there no Rest for me?

8.

So if, Reply'd the frind, as I have said, thou lovest,
And since experience thou want'st, thou sadly rovest,
Thou know'st the hand not which thee secretly protects,
Thou know'st the Mother not, who thee in love corrects.

9.

Since privisy thou Lov'st, to privet Grief thou'rt Bidden,
Since thou see'st not the Sun, Thou from thy self art hidden.
Yet in similitudes I'll Paint thy self to thee.
That thy distressed Soul somewhat refresh'd may be.

SECOND PART

10.

This Secret Love is like to sharp-Sword-pointed weapons,
Which Inward every where does wound thee, as now happens:
But when out of thy self, thy Lover thou shall wound,
Then will thy Body be, with Soul & Spirit found.

11.

The secret Jesus love is like one deeply wounded,
Whose Inward Bleeding flux, deep in the Heart is founded:
Nothing can ease this Pain, & nought can give it Rest,
Till it's into the Heart of it's Beloved prest.

12.

Think, said he, on the Stream, which by its silent flowing,
And stillness of its Ebb, its Depth there by is showing:
So can the Ground of Love at once not well be seen,
Untill the Sun's bright beams just over it has been.

13.

Consider precious Gold, how deep it lies infused
I'th Bowels of the Earth, & shall it once be used:
So must it through the fire its greatest heat be born,
Then may it after be as Crown and Septer worn.

14.

How sweet-wine must ferment, thou may'st thy self be thinking,
Before the faeces can be to the bottom sinking:
How long it lies, stopt up, before it springs i'th Glass;
Before it Nectar like, the Heart & Mind rejoyce.

15.

Think upon thy own Heart, the fountain of thy being
Its Motion may be felt, but ne'er was knowne by seeing:
So will the Love without, be secret and unknown;
But in the inward part her sev'nfold fire is blown.

16.

Think on all kind of Roots, how in the Earth they flowrish,
And therein seek thier food, the Plant & Seed to nourish,
So covered groweth Love, as all her fruits do show,
And is not hindered by Heat, Winter, Frost or Snow.

17.

Consider the Sun-flower, in Dark & Cloudy weather,
How faithfully she turns her face to her dear Lover;
Untill she's Pregnant grown, & bears like him a Seed:
Then Rests she, & does bow in gratitude her head.

18.

See the Senceable Plant, how if it be but touched,
It straitway sheds its Seed, altho in Pods 'tis couched:
It will by Heavens Dew be touched quite alone,
And only lookt upon but by the shining Sun.

19.

Consider Virgin Love, how Chast & Clean it gloweth:
How strong, yet Secret still, so that person knoweth;
No, not her Dear himself: She blush's to bashful face,
And Speechless quite she is when He doth her embrace.

20.

How grieveth she her self, when she cannot espie him?
Her Soul is fill'd with WO, because she is not by him:
She Grieves, she Longs, she Hopes, she fears, she frights, she faints,
And yet her Only Dear, Unknown, does cause these plaints.

21.

Unworthy thinks she her, to be by Him beloved,
Whom in Esteem she holds, the best that ever moved:
The more she Him regards, the less she thinks of Her;
And her own Vertues she does never think on more.

22.

Her Stature's her delight, Her Life is in his living,
Her Love into his Love she only will be giving:
When He lives not content, Her Life does want its breath,
Thinks she He loves her not, She grieves her self to Death.

23.

Her only thinking is how shee may pleas him better,
And what she sees, & hears, must as his Echo meet her:
How joys & springs she then! But when she does behold,
And see herself alone, she thinks her self Befoul'd.

24.

This grieves her heartily, that shee's become so foolish,
And that by means of Love; her Hopes will now grow coolish:
She now grows deadly sick, nought helps or strengthens her
But only her Dear Love, if she could see him near.

25.

Think on a Mothers state, in what a privet manner,
E'en to her self unknown, her fruit she feedeth in her:
Her Chast Heart needs will hide, when she is pregnant grown,
She will in secret be, with Mothers Care alone.

26.

And to the latest hour, before she is Deliver'd,
She gives her Courage lost, & from all Hope is sever'd:
She thinketh on no joy, but Trouble, fear, and Pain,
But Anguish, Grief, & Plaint, is ov'r, and ov'r again.

27.

Think on the Lord himself, the Author of thy being,
How He near thirty years did keep from Vulgar seeing:
His Converse was with God, not minded by the jews;
Nor is it yet well known how he his time did use.

28.

Think on his Agony, the Scriptures only names it,
And self Experience the best of all explains it:
How in his greatest need his father him forsook,
To cast him down to Hell he this occasion took.

29.

He bids thee follow him, but not to go before him,
Here, on the Cross; & There, on his Right hand adore him.
Yet forceth he no man, each one may will or no:
Therefore make now thy Choice, whilst thou art here below.

30.

Why now so full of thoughts, wilt thou yet make election?
Johann I tell thee free, make thereof no Reflection;
Thou hangst now on the Cross! take care & come not down;
Upon the Jewish call, be faithful, winn the Crown.

31.

Give up thy self to God! He yet will bind thee faster
Than he has ever done, Think not of thy Disaster,
Thy Sins & follies past, since God has giv'n thee Rest,
And thinks on them no more, but only for thy best.

32.

I yet have something more I would have said unto thee,
But self-love not being Dead, it may some dammage do thee:
I'll spare it at this time; In what thou hast be true,
So will be, when I come, Thy Soule and Body new.

THIRD PART

33.

Thereon the Frind did leave Johannes much relieved,
Yet in his very Soul most sadly he was grieved:
His frinds haste he could not a long while well digest,
His chief hope cut i'th' midst, & there by lost the best.

34.

Yet fast brake forth, & said, So be then Inward turned
O Sword! O Love! in me, untill this House is stormed:
Till Thine may raised, be instead of this my Old,
Till Deifi'd my soul may therein thee behold.

35.

Come wound me more & more, by thy loves sacred power,
That I may find its strength, & working every hour:
For killing of my strength, till through the Red-Sea Shore,
I press to thee, therefore come, wound me more & more

36.

Shine down upon my Stream, that it in quiet stillness,
May Run both In, & Out, out of thy Boundless fullness:
That I may see in Me, Thee with a Radiant Beam,
To Stand thou still O Sun, & shine upon my Stream.

37.

Make me as Living Gold, after thou hast me urged,
From Worldly Vanities, & through the Cross me purged:
The Test is wanting still, which therefore make me Cold,
To say, melt farther forth, make me as living Gold.

38.

Make me as the New Wine! from many noble Berries,
Of Lamb like Vertues! & by still fermenting sceries;
Till all the faecis fall, and I a Guest of thine,
May in thy Kingdom sit, make me as the New Wine.

39.

Make a new Heart in me, & only in thee living!
In Sacred Unity, & allways in thee moving!
And that it might exalt in Salem, only thee
For ever, so O Lord make a new Heart in me.

40.

So, Cover thou the Root begotten from thy fountain,
And sink it deeper down, when thou salt see it mounting:
That covered it may 'bide, & bring its rip'ned fruit.
In Drouth, & Wetness too, So cover thou the Root.

41.

Me, only thy Sun flower, let after thee be turning;
And in the pensive Night, & Darkness for thee mourning:
Until thy form in me, thy Christus hath full pow'r
Then stand I still in thee, I, only thy Sun flow'r.

42.

Me, thy senceable Plant, let no falce Love betide me,
No, ev'n thy Angels not! but only Thine let guide me:
That may be but Thine Eternally, this grant!
So am I full of fruit, I, thy Senceable Plant.

43.

The pure Virgin-love be brightly in me burning,
That when quite stript of All, to thee I may be turning:
With Blushing I may feel thy Spirits draught above,
That unknown may remain the pure Virgin-love.

44.

My only Lover, Thee, I have for me selected!
Know'st thou it or not, how the Love has me affected?
But what? I ask in vain, for nought I trouble me
Since I dare not behold my only Lover thee.

45.

Unworthy am I quite, how can I thus deceive me?
And yet methinks thou must at last in love receive Me:
O! fye! this Selfish love! fye, Proudest Hellish might;
Therefore I say with Grief, Unworthy am I quite.

46.

How like I my own wise! how love I my own living!
How can I with self-love my self be thus deceiving!
When I lives not content the love is cold as Ice,
And yet I think I love! So love I my own Wise.

47.

How finely do I think! but after my own measure;
And what I see & hear must Echo to my Pleasure:
How joyful Spring I then? But then again I shrink,
See Me, in Me belov'd! So finly do I think.

48.

I shall be scorn'd by fools, through this my selfish loving!
However I will still in Faith & Hope be Moving:
I will with David cry Sleepst thou O God of Souls!
Save Me from Me, that I be not the scorn of fools.

49.

As mother doth her fruit, so do thou Secret feed me
With Manna, me unknown, upon my Pilgram's journey:
Guide me as thee it pleas; hold me as thee it suit;
Lead me still by the Hand as Mother doth her fruit.

50.

O Center of my faith! let me remain so hidden
As thou hast done before, untill thy Day is bidden
At Midnight on to break! I'll hold, as Jacob saith
Till thou hast Blessed me, O Center of my faith!

51.

The fiery Agony pierce through, Calcine and scoure
My Reins, my Heart & Mind! & tho thou me in th'hour
Of greatest need forsak'st, I may thee Glorifie;
And thereby still think on thy fiery Agony.

52.

Let me but follow thee, not strive to go before thee;
Let me Here on the Cross, There, on thy Right adore thee:
Through Death & Hellish fear, through Kedrons blackest Sea,
Into thy Glory, so let me but follow thee.

CONCLUTION

53.

But Thou Divinest Love! who thy self hast begun it,
(This work of Love in us) so strengthen us to Run it:
Perfect it quite! & let us plainly see this is
(In this way of the Cross) the Love its Wilderness.
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Author of original: 
Johannes Kelpius
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