Classic Poem

(with acknowledgments to Cole Porter)

VERSE 1

Mr. Irving Berlin
Often emphasizes sin
In a charming way.
Mr. Coward, we know,
Wrote a song or two to show
Sex was here to stay.
Richard Rodgers, it's true,
Took a more romantic view
Of this sly biological urge.
But it really was Cole
Who contrived to make the whole
Thing merge.

REFRAIN 1

He said the Belgians and Greeks do it,
Nice young men who sell antiques do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
Monkeys whenever you look do it,
Aly Khan and King Farouk do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
Louella Parsons can't quite do it,
For she's so highly strung,
Marlene might do it,
But she looks far too young.
Each man out there shooting crap does it,
Davy Crockett in that dreadful cap does it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.

REFRAIN 2

Our famous writers in swarms do it,
Somerset and all the Maughams do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
The Brontis felt that they must do it,
Ernest Hemingway could — just — do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
E. Allan Poe — ho! ho! ho! — did it,
But he did it in verse.
H. Beecher Stowe did it,
But she had to rehearse.
Tennessee Williams, self-taught, does it,
Kinsey with a deafening report does it.
Let's do it, let's fall in love.

VERSE 2

In the Spring of the year
Inhibitions disappear
And our hearts beat high.
We had better face facts:
Every gland that overacts
Has an alibi.
For each bird and each bee,
Each slap-happy sappy tree,
Each temptation that lures us along
Is just Nature elle-même
Merely singing us the same
Old song.

REFRAIN 3

In Texas some of the men do it,
Others drill a hole — and then do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
West Point cadets forming fours do it,
People say all those Gabors do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
My kith and kin, more or less, do it,
Every uncle and aunt.
But I confess to it —
I've one cousin that can't .
Teenagers squeezed into jeans do it,
Probably we'll live to see machines do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.

REFRAIN 4

Girls from the RADA do it,
BBC announcers may do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
The Ballet Jooss to a man do it,
Alfred Lunt and Lynn Fontanne do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
My kith and kin, more or less, do it,
Every uncle and aunt,
But I confess to it,
I've one cousin who can't.
Some mystics, as a routine do it,
Even Evelyn Waugh and Graham Greene do it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.

REFRAIN 5

Each baby bat after dark does it,
In the desert Wilbur Clark does it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
We're told that every hormone does it,
Victor Borge all alone does it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
Each tiny clam you consume does it,
Even Liberace — we assume — does it,
Let's do it, let's fall in love.