Recipe for Penne Vodka
1. Fantasize about marrying your ex
2. Fill a pot with water
3. Attempt to mince garlic
4. Curse Gigi Hadid
5. Call your dad to ask how much pasta is appropriate to boil for one person
6. Frantically turn off the stove when the water boils over
7. Chop a yellow onion
8. Cry
9. Cry more than you realistically should for a yellow onion
10. Lay down on the floor
11. Become cold on the linoleum and regret every action that got you here
12. Get up
13. Add onions to hot oil in a skillet